Emotions can be oh so deep!
Part of being human is to feel enormous amount of pain. In my case, pain when it comes to relationship. I can not seem to handle mine at the moment. Maybe, because my mind is clouded, my heart is distorted or I am simply shattered. I so want to give up. I have been hurt and troubled for these past years, I guess I am just fed up. I feel weird now, I am likened to a robot. It is as if, I do not care anymore. How can I possibly see things clearly when I am in so much pain. He pretends as if things are okay. They are not okay, I am not okay. How I wish I can just shut down or change into an okay mode. Switch On, Switch Off that is. It is not that simple anymore. I cannot leave though, there is too much at stake. I do not want to cause hurt. So, the reality is even if I have to suffer, I have to accept it, this is my life, this is my reality.